Sunday, August 28, 2005

My favorite drunk memory, you say?

Wow. There are so many things I would like to write about. Many of my drunk "memories" are actually reconstructions of what people told me happened though, so as a journalist, I'll just go with one I remember experiencing firsthand.

Schrabotnik came to visit, and we were all a-twitter with the news. It had been almost a year since that crazy fuck was in town, and he did not disappoint. Although slimmer, wearing glasses and acting intelligent, he was still the same ridiculous Schrabotnik.

He was with Patty at the time, I think. We didn't really know her yet, and Schrabotnik brought her over. We were all pretty wasted, and he handed out a bunch of our beers to everyone and ran around with scissors, poking holes in the side and making us shotgun them. I didn't really get how to do it, so beer was flying everywhere. He decided the shotgunning wasn't interesting enough. He grabbed a fresh Coors Light, shook it up and cracked it open, spraying it all over me and the kitchen. Surprisingly, Erica was a little concerned about this-- and surprisingly, I was not. I began stomping around in the ankle deep beer, hair dripping wet and clothes full of brew. Schrabotnik threw out a "Let's hear it for Patty!" And I stood there with a Coors river running through my own kitchen and I splashed in it, clapping and yelling "Patty, Patty, Patty!"
Erica came running out of the bathroom with this ridiculous mop, I grabbed it from her and tried to mop it up. Shcrabotnik basically pulled a 'Welp, see you later' and took off. The next morning, Erica was furiously mopping, wringing, mopping and wringing a pretty deep river of beer in the kitchen. Hank-O and the clan were on their way over.

Next question!

What's one (or 9!) mistake from college you would take back if you could?

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